Young people's attitudes to domestic abuse

A couple of news reports today made me pause and think where we're going as a society. The first was news of the study on children's attitudes to violence, by Nancy Lombard of Napier University, which is to be presented at an event with Scottish Women's Aid on Wednesday. The second was news of a public awareness campaign on teenage domestic violence.

It's a relatively small study - 89 children at only five Glasgow Primaries - yet, I'm troubled by some of the comments reported in the study, which seem to hark back to some other age.

“They all said violence was wrong but, when we looked beneath that, they often saw it as justified by the actions of the woman.”

The BBC article on the public awareness campaign quotes Psychologist Dr Linda Papadopoulos:

"It is very interesting, the way it happens. It's much more about mind control. Through the language used, 'He doesn't allow me to do this, he wouldn't like me doing this'.

"It's as if the boy speaking to them like this is a way of them valuing them. As if they think, 'He cares enough to be jealous', and that is what is particularly worrying."

I find it quite disturbing that young women would willingly accept the notion that that they have done something to deserve violence. The societal pressures on young people seem to me to be greater now than even a few years ago, but nothing, even the fear of losing that first boyfriend or looking uncool, would have made me put up with that kind of behaviour.

Whether it's down to upbringing, the group of people you hang about with, or low self esteem and insecurity, it's not a path young women should be choosing. Accepting violence in relationships at a formative age is likely to set a pattern for all future relationships.

I don't see in the reports where these trends are coming from - whether it's family attitudes, the media, or something else entirely - but it will surely take a great deal of education to ensure these attitudes are not continued. As far as I remember, the teenage magazines I used to flick through would never have endorsed sympathy to abusive relationships, and I hope that hasn't changed. Men's magazines have been criticised for their attitudes towards women, but that alone can't explain this apparent trend.

I've heard anecdotes from those working with young people, who are also deeply concerned by some of the views they've heard. I know from meeting some groups in Glasgow that work is being done in schools with groups of young people of both sexes, and that football clubs and police have also worked together to target fans. It's up to all of us in society to challenge the notion that either side in a relationship is unworthy; this generation should not grow up under the cloud of domestic violence.

CIRV

I was invited on Wednesday 30th September to go along to the CIRV football awards; what makes this particularly interesting is what makes this football project different from you and your friends having a bit of a knock-about in the park. This celebration of football and sportsmanship was actually a very significant step in reducing violence in the east of Glasgow, and saving the lives and futures of young people in the area.

Partners from the agencies made clear to me afterwards that actually bringing together the young men from these gangs in the one room was a real achievement. Having them celebrating each other's success and leaving afterwards without any threat of violence was remarkable. I was told that at the start of the project, many of these young men couldn't be in the same room together without violence breaking out. This change in behaviour had been achieved through a lot of hard work, investment, support and a focus on positive alternatives.

I was impressed by the description, but keen to find out more.

I've attended presentations by people from CIRV, and readers may already be familiar with CIRV through Cherie Blair's Dispatches documentary on Channel Four. It's certainly worth watching to get a handle on what is being done. The discription on their website reads thus:

The Community Initiative to Reduce Violence (CIRV – pronounced ‘Serve’) is a multi-agency initiative designed to reduce gang violence across Glasgow. CIRV aims to reduce the impact and incidence of antisocial behaviour and violence, the involvement of young people in crime and the fear of crime – there will be other positive outcomes that are supplementary to these aims.

The staff who work on the programme invited me along to a gang 'call in' at the Sheriff Court a week ago last Friday. The Evening Times carried the story yesterday. I found it deeply moving on many levels.

Court 8 had been set up in such a way that 30-40 young gang members were on one side, and all the staff and speakers on the other. Each speaker in turn would rise, and move over to the side of the court the young people were on to make their points.

A number of speakers related the options open to the young people in the room - prison, death, or changing their ways. Two surgeons from Medics Against Violence showed graphic pictures of the damage a baseball bat, a knife and a gun can do. People who had committed crimes in the past, including murder, spoke movingly about how this affected them. Karen, a very strong and brave mother, described the impact on her life and family of her son's stabbing. The police were firm and made it clear that the law would catch up with these gang members, one after the next, if they chose not to get out.

All the way through, there was a emphasis on the alternatives and the chance for each of the young people to be supported and to make something of their life if they got out of the gang culture.

The young people were given an opportunity to sign up there and then, and given a card away with them should they want to think it over and come to the programme later. It's clear that breaking from the people you've grown up with and spent your life with is difficult, but all the speakers were equally clear that those people who hold you back in life are not your friends, and that better things lie ahead. The choice is in their hands.